My fellow Americans,
It is a great honor to be celebrating my first Christmas as your president. It is at this time that we all come together and celebrate the true meaning of the season: getting presents. I would like to share with you the gifts I have both received and hope to receive this year. There have never been such great gifts in the history of gifts; they’re yuge! I may have to send some of these back. We’ll have to wait and see… sad. On behalf of the First Family, here is The Twelve Days of Trump-mas.
On the first day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
A great wall made for free.
On the second day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the third day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the fourth day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Four lying staffers
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two Dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the fifth day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Five lawsuits pending
Four lying staffers
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the sixth day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Six tweets a minute
Five lawsuits pending
Four lying staffers
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the seventh day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Seven links with Russia
Six tweets a minute
Five lawsuits pending
Four lying staffers
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the eighth day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Eight divisive comments
Seven links with Russia
Six tweets a minute
Five lawsuits pending
Four lying staffers
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the ninth day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Nine offended countries
Eight divisive comments
Seven links with Russia
Six tweets a minute
Five lawsuits pending
Four lying staffers
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the tenth day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Ten lawyers present
Nine offended countries
Eight divisive comments
Seven links with Russia
Six tweets a minute
Five lawsuits pending
Four lying staffers
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the eleventh day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
Eleven months of mayhem
Ten lawyers present
Nine offended countries
Eight divisive comments
Seven links with Russia
Six tweets a minute
Five lawsuits pending
Four lying staffers
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
On the twelfth day of Christmas, Santa gave to me
A twelve white male Cabinet
Eleven months of mayhem
Ten lawyers present
Nine offended countries
Eight divisive comments
Seven links with Russia
Six tweets a minute
Five lawsuits pending
Four lying staffers
Three Mrs. Trumps
Two dumbass sons and
A great wall made for free.
